The Friend Group | Why “Squads” Are Holding You Back

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The #SquadGoals fad seems to have died down and I for one am happy to see it fade away. Obviously I fully support close bonds between one another and love to see how some people just click, but the concept of “squads” never sat well with me. I don’t have a single specific or defining friend group and that’s the way I intend to keep it. On the surface, these groups seem perfect. You would never have to do anything by yourself because the same people will be there for anything you would ever need to do. You would be able to go to class together, eat lunch together, do homework together (or, let’s be real, attempt to do homework), participate in student organizations together, party together, and, naturally, take millions of pictures together to post online with the hopes of making everyone else jealous they aren’t a part of your […]

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In Seven Words

In Seven Words

Yesterday was the first day of my online class for the summer. Assignment number one was to make a forum post introducing ourselves. Apparently there’s no such thing as escaping the dreaded ice breakers, even in a virtual class. Yay school 😉 Anyway, it seemed easy- you know, the basic name/year/major spiel that is the tried and true go-to for every omg-I-just-met-you-what-do-we-talk-about conversation with someone new in college. To take it one step further, we also had to include a description of ourselves using only seven words. Sounds simple, right? Well. As is my nature, I completely panicked and overthought every single one of those seven words, but hey, it got me thinking. There’s so much background to any one word we could pick to describe ourselves: so much context, depth, perceptions, experiences, subconscious, relationships, interests, jobs, dreams… you get the idea. All of those came into play to make […]

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A Look Into The Anxious Mind

A Look Into The Anxious Mind

Anxiety takes on so many different forms that it can be hard to fit into one box. Some people have more “extreme” experiences than others, but you can’t compare your struggles to someone else’s and make your own invalid. Nothing about you is invalid. I know that can be hard to convince yourself is true; I struggle with it myself even though I blog about it quite frequently. Below I have more or less a surface look into one aspect of my own anxiety that surrounds my relationships with the people in my life. As I mention, some days it gets worse and some days it gets better, but if you can understand why I apologize all the time or why I try to shrink back as much as possible or why the smallest of things make my day, then you will have a much better understanding of me and […]

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Stop Ignoring Your Worth

Stop Ignoring Your Worth-1

You clicked through to this post today for a reason. Maybe it’s because you want a little pep talk. Maybe it’s because you want to read my story of how I realized that I actually matter so you can find that for yourself. Maybe you’re just one of my friends trying to procrastinate on your homework (love you!). Or, maybe, you want an opportunity to tell me none of this applies to you. You still can’t see your own value so you think “Oh yeah? Don’t tell me what to do. You don’t know me” and go to work on your three page rebuttal as to why I’m wrong. Spoiler: I’m not 😉 This stubborn self-doubt can be, believe it or not, a form of entitlement which I recently read about in Mark Manson’s new book. According to Manson, “…construing everything in life so as to make yourself out to be […]

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Stop Helping And Serve Instead

Stop Helping.Serve Instead.-1

First, I apologize for my mini hiatus over the past two weeks. I promise it was all worth it though- I can’t wait to share what I’ve been up to and what I’ve learned! That post is live! Read it here. This spring break, I participated in another alternative service break trip through my university. We flew out to California to work with the nonprofit GRID Alternatives to install solar panels in underserved communities as well as integrate ourselves in the culture of the San Francisco Bay area. As I sat in my room on my first night back in North Carolina after a whirlwind of a week, I started to think back on a piece my team leader (shout-out to Kara <3 ) read to us on our service break the year before to rural Appalachia West Virginia. It discusses the difference between helping, fixing, and serving (you can […]

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Choosing Joy

Choosing Joy

Life is hard. Our days seem to always be packed as we try to fit more and more into every twenty-four hours. When we reach a minor set back- an extra long line at Starbucks before class, stop-and-go traffic on the way home from work, forgetting to take dinner out of the oven, uncooperative WiFi right before an assignment is due, or unusually cranky kids (or floormates, same difference 😉 )- we’re frustrated, angry, and extra stressed. We not only let those emotions get the best of us, but we take them out on those around us as well. We think life is simply out to get us, that it’s just our luck. The first week of this semester, I was angry. I was curt, irritated, and just very tense all the time. Literally anything would drive me insane- my suitemates talking at night, the kid snoring next to me […]

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Why International Students Are Low Key Amazing

Why International Students Are Low Key Amazing

College is a completely different world. Very typical, cliche statement, I know. So what happens when you go to experience this completely different world, but in a completely different country? Science especially brings people together from all over, so I’ve had the great opportunity to learn from people of all corners of the globe. In addition to everyday interactions, I’ve done a parade of flags (a parade showcasing countries from around the world) and worked as a mentor for incoming international freshmen. Being able to witness all that these kids are doing has made me realize how completely amazing international students are no matter which school they travel to. Who else shows such dedication, prioritization, and sacrifice for their education, ambitions, and a brighter future? I’m completely in awe of the students that fly across the world to live, learn, and work completely immersed in a foreign country all at […]

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7 Unconventional Things To Be Thankful For

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Happy Thanksgiving! It’s a common thing in many families to go around the dinner table and say what you’re thankful for that year. Natural, easy responses to this tradition are always family, friends, health, good food, etc. Today, I’m sharing 7 things we should give thanks for, even if they may not always seem that great on the surface.   1. Failure You’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand times- failure is important. It helps you grow, it helps you learn. Failure is the best teacher because it acts with tough love. It helps you remember that things may go wrong sometimes, but life will go on. Be thankful that you are able to try and, even if it doesn’t exactly go as planned, be thankful that you are able to move forward. You’ve been given another chance, so take full advantage of that opportunity!   2. Strangers […]

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Why Being “Special” Is A Scam

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I’m going to be blunt. You aren’t special. You aren’t even a little bit better than everyone else around you. You might have a 5.0 GPA and be valedictorian. You might be captain of the varsity soccer team. You might be class president or prom queen or the most popular girl in school. You might have been employee of the month every month since you started working. You might have been the essay every teacher used as an example for the rest of the class. You might have gotten your driver’s license in one go. Your parents might have bought you a car on your sixteenth birthday (when you can’t even drive yourself yet, I’ll never understand this). But you aren’t special and you certainly aren’t superior to the rest of the world.   “Contrary to what your u9 soccer trophy suggests, your glowing seventh grade report card, despite every assurance […]

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Inaugural Post of Sonder

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Well isn’t this exciting! I’m sitting at my desk writing my very first blog post and you’re on the other side of the screen reading it! Hello friend! So why are you here? What makes me different from the hundreds of other millennials starting a blog? The truth is, maybe I’m not so different. We’re a part of such an amazing, hopeful, can-do generation. Enter the idea of sonder… “n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness— …thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra…in the background…” — The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows I love this philosophy because it seems so simple on the surface, but the layers only go deeper once you actually start to think about it. […]

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